Maybe I Know More Than I Think I Know
For the last few days I have little doubt that I’ve been a bain upon my friends; inflicting upon them an unending verbal narrative about how I’m most certainly going to fail next week. If any of them is reading this, consider this my apology: I’m sorry. I know we’re all scared. We’re all, as my mother would say, “in the same boat”. And it’s true. But somehow that doesn’t make it any easier.
But this might…
Time For A New Theme?
Posted by Adam in Development Notes on June 16th, 2009
I had been getting comfortable with the way my blog was looking. A custom header graphic and logo on the fusion theme by digital nature had made me very happy. But recently, they upgraded the theme and I find it less useful than it was before. So once again, I figure it’s time to find a new theme.
This time I think I’ll build it myself. While I know that’s a lot of work, it is ultimately the only way I’ll get the blog to look exactly how I want. And as the blog evolves, I realize that its needs change and with them, the demands it puts on a blog theme. Read the rest of this entry »
So, What Now?
So, it’s a little under 2 weeks to my pre-registration pharmacy exam. To say I’m absolutely terrified is a gross understatement. While I don’t feel stressed on the surface, the pressure, nervousness and panic comes in bouts. And while I can say that with every day that passes, I feel more ready than I did the day before, and that now I’m actively filling gaps in my knowledge, it’s one of those exams that whenever I take it, I can’t ever see myself feeling confident and ready for it. I’ll just go in there and hope that I can get enough right answers to pass it.
But as what is effectively the end of student life approaches, thoughts and ideas continue to enter my head with regards to what I’m going to do after I’ve qualified. Since I never really wanted to be a pharmacist in the first place, the simple answer: start working and earn a living, meet a girl, get married, have kids and grow old is neither satisfying nor imagineable at this point. I’m not ready to settle down yet. What this means is that the next step, probably contrary to most of my fellow students, is not obvious. The story does not write itself. The last five years have not been a logical step towards an obvious goal.
With everything that’s happened over the last five years, different desires and different ambitions are pulling me in different directions and, to be honest, I’m unsure at this point which voices to listen to and which to ignore.
RPSGB Mock was “Armageddon”
Today I got up bright and early feeling fairly confident about the mock exam I had coming up. I’d had plenty of practise at sample papers and was consistently passing them, so didn’t foresee a problem.
I had a good breakfast and drove to university feeling calm and collected.
Cut forward to four o clock:
The open book exam (the second of the day) had just finished and Dr Hawksworth had said we could talk for a few minutes. I have my head down on the desk and let out a desperate and frustrated wail. It had been terrible. Absolutely terrible. A mob hit. Read the rest of this entry »
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